10 Reasons to Buy Lots of Yarn

1. It insulates the cupboard where it is kept.
2. It keeps the economy moving. It is my patriotic duty to support wool farmers, textile mills, and yarn shops.
3. It is less expensive and more fun than psychiatric care.
4. I'm participating in a contest - the one who dies with the most yarn wins!
5. It keeps without refrigeration, you don't have to cook it to enjoy it, you never have to feed it, change it, wipe its nose or walk it.
6. Because I'm worth it.
7. Like dust, it's good for protecting previously unprotected spaces in the house, like the ironing board, the laundry basket, the dining room table
8. It's not immoral, illegal or fattening. It calms the nerves, ratifies the soul, and makes me feel good.
9. Because it is on sale. Because that is such a beautiful color... I've never seen it before... I must have it.
10. Buy it now, before your husband retires and goes with you on all your shopping expeditions.